Sex

15-seksknuffelenmasserenCuddling and massage – You don’t have to get undressed immediately. Lie down in bed with your friend and caress him or run your tongue across his chest, hmmmm! It can be very exciting and pleasurable to cuddle, kiss, caress and so on. And it is very healthy. During cuddling your body releases a hormone called oxytocin that improves the circulation and inhibits the production of cortisol – a stress producing hormone. Massaging each other can also be a wonderful feeling. Just do what you enjoy and what makes your friend happy.

masturberenMasturbation (jerking off) – The easiest and most pleasurable way of coming differs from person to person. There are many ways of doing this. Sitting, standing, lying down or whatever. You can use both hands, one hand or your thumb and index finger. Another way is to stimulate the head of your penis directly – preferably using some spit or a lubricant – otherwise this could be painful. In the meanwhile you can use your other hand to stimulate other sensitive parts of your body. For example your balls, the area between your balls and your anus, your nipples or whatever.

→ Masturbation-page

Jerking off with a condom is a completely different experience. It also avoids the usual ‘sports stains’ and is good practice for when you really need to use a condom.

Careful with home, garden or kitchen products or utensils! Not everything is safe to masturbate with. Guys who push their dicks into a bottle might have to break the bottle after coming in order to remove their penis, as the vacuum created makes it difficult to remove. This could result in injury. Just as bad an idea is putting your dick into a vacuum cleaner. The vacuum could cause the veins in your penis to burst. Not good.

Myths about masturbation – There are some stupid myths about masturbation. 
→ Read the masturbation myths on JackinWorld

elkaarMutual masturbation – From a technical point of view jerking someone else off is no different than doing it to yourself. But everyone has their own technique. You might therefore have an unpleasant surprise on occasion if your friend uses a totally different approach.

A few tips – Try to recognize your partner’s reaction and adjust your technique if you can’t get him hard. Of course you could also ask him what he enjoys. Or you could get him to show you with your hand beneath his so that you can feel how and where he applies pressure, etc.

For uncut guys (with foreskin) – Move the foreskin up and down with two fingers, or by making a ring with your fingers or your whole fist. Some guys prefer that you concentrate on the area around the head. Others prefer stimulation at the root. The same applies to the foreskin: with some you need to be very careful and others just want you to squeeze it. It is up to you to figure out what your friend enjoys most.

For cut guys (with no foreskin) – Here you are rubbing the head and the penis directly. This is the same as pulling back the foreskin on an uncut dick. It is less painful if you wet your hand with some spit or lubricant, cream, Vaseline, etc. or ask him how he usually does it. Try a bit of everything. Go slow or fast, use the pre-cum as a natural lubricant, caress his balls, and watch him enjoy… Coming together – When jerking each other off, it is also quite easy to make sure that you both come at the same time. It is just a question of anticipating, postponing and speeding up, all pretty exciting in itself and double the fireworks is so much more spectacular!

pijpenBlow jobs – During a blowjob you use your mouth to stimulate your friend. Another word for blowjob is fellatio. It is no surprise that this is a wonderful feeling: the mouth is warm and moist and it feels fantastic! With the finer movements of your tongue and lips you can stimulate and ‘play’ the penis. It is all about reading the signals and responding accordingly. If you are not sure whether you are doing a good job, just ask.

Be careful with your teeth when giving a blow job. Open your mouth wide enough and use your lips to cover your teeth. Being aware of this can avoid painful contact. There are also guys who like it when you use your teeth very gently on their dicks. Just do what pleases the both of you.

An example – Start kissing his stomach and slowly move down to his penis. First lick his navel, then the inside of his thighs and tease him by staying close to his dick. You can also use your tongue to play with his balls. Slide your tongue up his shaft and play with the head: lick it, slide your lips gently over it, etc. Then you can start taking the penis deeper into your mouth and slide your lips all the way down. Don’t be too rough, softness is the key. Some like it slow and others fast. Or sometimes very sensually and at other times a little wild. Everything goes.

Condom – If you have massaged each other and you use a condom, be aware that the condom ruptures much more easily if it comes into contact with oil or fat that may still be on your body

droogneukenDry-fuck (frottage) – It can be extremely hot to ‘fuck’ without entering your partner’s anus. You simulate intercourse by rubbing your penis against his bum, stomach or back for example. It is officially known as frottage (originates from the French word for rubbing: frotter) or ‘dry fucking’. (Uh, dry?) You can do it in such a way that you are both stimulated. Lie down facing each other so that your dicks rub against each other. This way you can also kiss. You can also take your friends dick between your legs using a lubricant and squeeze your legs together. Especially standing you can apply quite a bit of pressure on his dick and it feels and looks almost real. You don’t even have to remove your clothes. Try dry fucking with your clothes on – it is a totally different feeling.

vingerenFingering – Many nerves end in the anus. Because a man’s prostate gland can be massaged via the anus, it’s also a ‘sexual zone’. What is the ‘prostate’? The prostate produces the liquid contained in your sperm and it also closes the urinary tract during sex. This prevents urine from escaping during ejaculation. The prostate is extremely sensitive and many guys will come purely from stimulation or ‘massaging’ of their prostates.

Practice – Some practice is required to do this well. You have to learn to control your sphincter and not automatically tighten up when something tries to enter you. It is mostly a question of relaxing. Start by carefully practicing on yourself. Once you can do this, you can also try it with two or three fingers. A single finger is smaller and therefore less forceful than a stiff penis. For easy entry use a lubricant. Be careful… The mucus membrane in the anus is extremely sensitive, so a sharp finger nail can be both painful and damaging. It is also not a good idea to use house, garden or kitchen utensils.

Combi-Nice – The nice thing about fingering is that you can simultaneously do other things as well: you can caress your friend all over his body, jerk him off or give him a blow job.

neukenIntercourse – Why do men have anal intercourse? The male ass has something quite unique that the female does not possess and that is the prostate gland. When massaged, by either a finger or an erect penis, it can cause incredible sensations. Many men can come just from having this prostate gland massage, without even touching their own penis. For many men, buttocks can be very exciting as well. And besides exciting, having intercourse can be really intimate too.

Prejudice – Many people find intercourse (or even just the thought of it) so exciting that will try and convince you that it is the only true form of sex. This is of course nonsense. But to write off anal sex just because we have been taught that it is dirty is also somewhat extreme.

Not yet ready for this? If you are not ready for intercourse, read up on frottage (dry fucking) toe see how you can simulate the feeling. It is almost the real thing. And if you want you can find someone who has had the experience and can assist you with the technical details.

Intercourse: always with a condom. Always use a condom and sufficient water or silicon based lubricant when having intercourse. The risk of contracting a sexually transmitted disease or HIV is greater during anal intercourse.

Below, you can read how to use a condom

Condom – If you have massaged each other and you use a condom, be aware that the condom ruptures much more easily if it comes into contact with oil or fat that may still be on your body.

Start by relaxing. The inserter is often referred to as the ‘top’ and the insertee as the ‘bottom’. Start slowly and always remember that the ‘bottom’ might always ask you to pull back your penis. In the beginning it can be quite painful. The pain itself from initial anal intercourse is caused by the sphincter muscle (the ass ring). That muscle is often very tight and clamping down on the finger er penis. Relaxing is the key and works miracles! Take your time and start in a relaxed manner and it will be satisfying for both of you. To make it easier, start with some cuddling and massaging and then some fingering.

snelklaarkomenPremature ejaculation – Coming too early during sex can happen from time to time. But if you come before your partner has even undressed himself completely – that is a problem. Also if you come after two or three pushes it can be frustrating and disappointing. Even more disappointing is if you hardly have the feeling of an orgasm during a premature ejaculation.

Here are a few tips to help prevent premature ejaculation. It mostly boils down to this: you need to learn to recognize an orgasm and feel *when* you can no longer contain it. Then you can stop in time to prevent it and only continue once the feeling has subsided.

Practices during masturbation:
Squeezing – Just before you can no longer stop an orgasm, put your hand around your penis and squeeze just below the head with your thumb for about 4 seconds.

Start-stop technique – Figure out on your own what the moment is just before you are about to come. Stop masturbating when you get close to this point and only continue when the feeling has subsided. Repeat this for about 15 minutes and then come. If you can control this, you can do the same during intercourse: at the point where you feel you are about to have an orgasm, you can stop moving or change over to a less pleasurable action.

condoom-roodHow do you use a condom?

  1. No sharp nails? – If you have sharp nails, don’t put on a condom – then get your partner to do it.
  2. Open the condom with your hands.
  3. Remove the condom and put it loosely on the end of your penis.
  4. Pinch the air out of the small semen reservoir at the top end of the condom, keeping the condom in place on the head of your penis.
  5. With your other hand roll the condom down over the head of your penis and over the ridge. (Pull your foreskin backwards.) Roll it down the entire length of your penis.
  6. Once the condom is rolled down completely, your penis looks like it has no foreskin.

Lubrication – Some condoms are lubricated and some come with a small pouch of lubricant. Never use lotion or oil as a lubricant when using a condom, as it affects the rubber and can cause it to tear.

After you came – Once you have ejaculated make sure the condom doesn’t slip off your penis. Use a condom only once. After use, tie a knot in it, wrap it in tissue and discard it.

Practice – Practice on your own putting on a condom, for when you really need to use one.

Don’t forget to check-out the Safe Sex page

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